Labontefan
04-06-2001, 09:52 PM
************
JOKE: Haiku Error Messages
Sony has announced its own computer operating system is now available. Instead of producing the cryptic error messages characteristic of Microsoft's Windows operating systems, Sony's chairman said, "We intend to capture the high ground by putting a human, Japanese face on what has been - until now ... an operating system that reflects Western cultural hegemony. For example, we have replaced the impersonal and unhelpful Microsoft error messages with our own Japanese haiku poetry."
The chairman went on to give examples of Sony's new error messages:
**- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
*A file that big?
*It might be very useful.
*But now it is gone.
**- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
*The Web site you seek
*cannot be located but
*endless others exist
**- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
*Chaos reigns within.
*Reflect, repent, and reboot.
*Order shall return.
**- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
**- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
*Yesterday it worked
*Today it is not working
*Windows is like that.
**- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
*First snow, then silence.
*This thousand dollar screen dies
*so beautifully.
**- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
*With searching comes loss
*and the presence of absence:
*"My Novel" not found.
**- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
*Windows NT crashed.
*I am the Blue Screen of Death.
*No one hears your screams.
**- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
*Stay the patient course
*Of little worth is your ire
*The network is down
**- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
*A crash reduces
*your expensive computer to
*a simple stone.
**- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
*Three things are certain:
*Death, taxes, and lost data
*Guess which has occurred.
**- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
*You step in the stream,
*but the water has moved on.
*This page is not here.
**- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
*Out of memory.
*We wish to hold the whole sky,
*But we never will.
**- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
*Having been erased,
*The document you're seeking
*Must now be retyped.
**- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
*Serious error.
*All shortcuts have disappeared.
*Screen. Mind. Both are blank.
JOKE: Haiku Error Messages
Sony has announced its own computer operating system is now available. Instead of producing the cryptic error messages characteristic of Microsoft's Windows operating systems, Sony's chairman said, "We intend to capture the high ground by putting a human, Japanese face on what has been - until now ... an operating system that reflects Western cultural hegemony. For example, we have replaced the impersonal and unhelpful Microsoft error messages with our own Japanese haiku poetry."
The chairman went on to give examples of Sony's new error messages:
**- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
*A file that big?
*It might be very useful.
*But now it is gone.
**- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
*The Web site you seek
*cannot be located but
*endless others exist
**- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
*Chaos reigns within.
*Reflect, repent, and reboot.
*Order shall return.
**- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
**- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
*Yesterday it worked
*Today it is not working
*Windows is like that.
**- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
*First snow, then silence.
*This thousand dollar screen dies
*so beautifully.
**- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
*With searching comes loss
*and the presence of absence:
*"My Novel" not found.
**- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
*Windows NT crashed.
*I am the Blue Screen of Death.
*No one hears your screams.
**- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
*Stay the patient course
*Of little worth is your ire
*The network is down
**- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
*A crash reduces
*your expensive computer to
*a simple stone.
**- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
*Three things are certain:
*Death, taxes, and lost data
*Guess which has occurred.
**- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
*You step in the stream,
*but the water has moved on.
*This page is not here.
**- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
*Out of memory.
*We wish to hold the whole sky,
*But we never will.
**- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
*Having been erased,
*The document you're seeking
*Must now be retyped.
**- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
*Serious error.
*All shortcuts have disappeared.
*Screen. Mind. Both are blank.